Guards! Guards – The “M” Word

Guards! Guards – The “M” Word

Colon stops Vimes from saying a certain word that in certain circumstances, is a form of suicide in Ankh Morpork.

For some reason I remembered the Librarian jamming Colon’s helmet down so hard, they had to use grease to take it off. Because of this, I was kicking myself for forgetting to have Colon wearing in his helmet. Fortunately, after rereading the scene, I found I was happily mistaken. (The Librarian only held him upside down and bounced him a few times.)

orangutan discworld Samuel Vimes The Librarian Fred Colon illustration pen and ink
“Er, just one thing, Captain,“ said Colon urgently, to Vimes’s astonished eyes. “You don’t use the ‘M’ word. Gets right up his nose, sir. He can’t help it, he loses all self-control. Like a red flag to a wossman, sir. gets right up his nose. ‘Ape’ is all right, sir, but not the ‘M’ word. Because, sir, when he gets angry he doesn’t just go and sulk, sir if you get my drift. He’s no trouble at all apart from that, sir. All right? Just don’t say monkey. Ohshit.“
Guards! Guards! Page 181